Fashion has lost its visionary. He was the first to put women in pants, the first to put them in tuxedos, the first to put them in masculine clothes, and the first to employ black models. Women around the world owe Yves Saint Laurent a debt for revolutionising their wardrobes.
Sorry celebutards, but it seems that flashing your snatch is now both passe and avoidable. Thanks to Shibue Couture, there is a product that prevents not only your beev from catching cold, but also flashing your vag to the paps.
It’s like a sexy merkin.
But Ali, how do they work?” you may be wondering. I would hope the pictures are self-explanatory (okay, now I’m blushing). The panties go from your…triangle(?) to the top of your crack without wrapping around your hips. A side note to confused guys-where this differs from ordinary thongs is that on any girl with some meat on her bones, the straps unavoidably cut into one’s hips, resulting in pantylines under anything fitted. And I thought normal g-strings were torture devices.
Each cootch cover comes with a liner and spare adhesives (so you can have coverage and get a bikini wax at the same time!). The adhesives mold to your special place (ow), thus making these gems reusable. Just remove the sticky stuff (the tape, people, the tape), rinse the fabric with mild soap and water (you still with me?), put on new adhesive, and you’re ready to whore out again.
Eh, I shouldn’t be too critical. I can appreciate that this could be a lifesaver to someone wearing a formal gown who doesn’t want VPL or to go commando. The website also suggests that their product is perfect for strippers women who love to dance. But what happens when you have to pee? Similar in concept, the ‘C-String‘ looks the same, only it stays in place with the use of wire. Sort of a headband for your crotch. Yeah, these things are actually marketed as ’sexy and elegant’. Christ, what if they fell off whilst wearing a skirt? ‘Scuse me while I pick up my…thingy.
I tried to throw in as many euphemisms for the vagina as I could. Long story short, for 30 bucks a pop, I’ll DIY it with some double-sided tape. Or not.
Agyness Deyn. My new obsession. She is the most beautiful thing on the runways these days, and she is a much welcomed precursor of the return of the supermodel.
She’s younger than me, and she’s already the shit in Britain and the States. Most notably, the face of Armani and Burberry. To dig a little deeper, a mainstay in House of Holland and Gareth Pugh shows (google them-please). Her own personal style has been described as ‘Jackie O. crossed with Debbie Harry meets Stevie Nicks’, but whether onstage or backstage, she looks fierce in anything.
A few years ago (at a whopping size 4) she was told she needed to lose weight at castings in Italy. Now she’s being nonchalantly referred to as the next Kate Moss-minus the rusty pipes. In all fairness, the bitch does have curves-for a model. Last November, she won ‘Model of the Year’ at the British fashion awards, and shes opened and closed dozens of shows in New York, London, Milan, and Paris this year (I tried to count them all on style.com, it took too long).
Also, she plays guitar in a band (Lucky Knitwear), designs jewelry (for House of Holland), guest DJs at Misshapes, and dates a musician (Josh Hubbard of The Paddingtons). Are you in love with her yet?
Bitch is fierce.
